Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Up

Much better the last few days, thank you for your kind words and wishes. April was just not my month, but since Monday (the 1st day of May- coincidence? I think not!) I feel... almost.. what is it called? Happy. Ah yes. Methinks I remember this feeling. Is good. Is very good.

In other news. I have decided that if eucalyptus was a controlled substance I would be in serious danger of breaking the law. Sing it with me now..

Breakin' the law, breakin' the law
Breakin' the law, breakin' the law

Because I am obsessed with the little knobbly thingies that fall off the trees around here and smell so incredibly good that I can't help picking them up off the ground and carrying them around like a little kid, putting them up to my nose every few minutes for a blissful whiff. Yup, I'm an addict. Luckily the part of the Stanford campus I was wandering around on was pretty deserted so there were no witnesses to call the authorities on me.

As evidence that perhaps eucalyptus should be regulated in some way, I offer you the following profound thought I had while ah, inhaling yesterday. The knobbly thingies or gumnuts (I'm not kidding, I looked this up on Wiki. They look like this:)
are the west coast version of acorns. Mind-boggling, eh? (heh heh, I just wrote bloggling. The ironing!) I had this epiphany after noticing that some of them were missing the green parts and had nothing but an empty woody shell that looked like nothing so much as an empty acorn cup (cap?) and I reasoned that the ground squirrels might scoop out and eat the middle. The gumnuts are California's version of acorns, which are eaten by California's version of, well, squirrels. But wait, they're completely different from normal squirrels, i.e. the ones we superior New Englanders have scurrying around in our backyards storing acorns and digging up our &#%&#@* tulip bulbs and taking one bite out of them and them throwing them on the ground as if to taunt us.

Of course they have regular squirrels here too, but that's beside the point. The ground squirrels are these funny little furballs who look like tree squirrels until you see then run. They have a weird hoppy gait that I suppose comes from being adapted to dig holes instead of climb trees. Also, they're sometimes fatter than tree squirrels, which goes to show that climbing trees is good excercise, something I've always firmly believed.

If you haven't already figured this out, I like to feel superior by frequently reminding people that I am from a place much better than this one in every way (except that it's really really cold in the winter and humid in the summer and there's this stoic yankee mentality where people don't talk about problems openly, preferring instead the bury em n' fester method). In the same vein, when I'm visiting home I like to point out that in California it's sunny and 70 degrees every day all year long and the streets are paved with gold (although actually- prepare yourself- it rains here sometimes and the cost of living is ridiculous and people are way too wrapped in in their BMWs and ipods and making sure junior will get into Stanford someday even though he's only 3 years old).

I'm thinking about moving to the midwest. I just have to make sure they have eucalyptus trees there. I can quit anytime I want, I just don't want to.

8 comments:

Lisa C said...

Yay, you're back!

Don't move to the Midwest. Seriously, what are you thinking?

Snooley said...

don't move... I will personally remove any evil tempting midwestern eucalyptus trees ...

Amanda said...

Interesting that you wrote "bloggling", but did you mean "the irony"? after that, instead of "the ironing", which is what you actually typed?

I'm so confused.

Forget California, forget the midwest--MOVE HOME! It's gorgeous here today--the sun is shining, the breeze is delightful, and the lilac bush (my own gumnut, as it were) is getting ready to bloom outside my kitchen window!

xoxo
Amanda

jess said...

I did mean the irony, and the ironing. Get it? Blame Sarah, she's the one who came up with it.

The midwest comment was also a joke. Geez obviously my sense of humor is too ree-fined and sub-tle for youz guys. :0)

Amanda said...

Well, I still don't get the "irony/ironing" joke...chalk it up to mommy-brain!

You are incredibly perceptive, though--how did you know that refined and subtle are THE two words I think of when I think of you? :o)

echapralis said...

Hi Jess,
Glad to hear you're feeling better.
I missed your bloggin b/c you're so totally fab. i lub u.

libby :)

jess said...

I lub you too, Lib. :) You da sis bomb.

Christine said...

well...I'm in the midwest. We have bluebonnets... :}

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