Sunday, June 22, 2008

Dooce Learned Everything She Knows About Annoying Her Parents From Me


Translation: Dear Mom, Please cancel my subscription to Guidepost immediately. I am shocked and dismayed to see that they are printing articles about saving the environment. Obviously the offices have been taken over by commie pinko leftist liberals- please excuse my French. 

As a good Republican I know that anything that includes the words "green" or "planet" must be liberal tripe designed to warp the very fabric of the universe.

Sincerely,or rather, Cerely,
Yr. dtr

My mom gets me a subscription every year to the Christian magazine, Guideposts. They're all about the Power of Positive Thinking at Guideposts and they also favor miraculous events. She claims it's because I used to steal hers before she got a chance to read it every month when I was a kid, but I think she's really hoping that it might influence me for the better now that I live in the land of godless heathens (California). I came across something Dad would definitely NOT approve of in one issue (because, global warming-a huge conspiracy!! According to my dad, no sane person would be tempted to believe in such an outlandish idea, besides, Rush Limbaugh says it's not true, and in my parents' house, Rush's word is law.) and I felt the need to alert her of the danger. She loves it when I do that.

1 comment:

Gypsy Guru said...

This post (and Dooce's) is incredibly amusing to me in such myriad ways that I couldn't possibly begin to scratch the surface of that iceberg.

I am glad that our generation is at least considering that humans can affect global ecology, even if there are any number of flawed arguments that fall under the umbrella of "green". Who'd've thought a COLOR could incite such vehemence and fervor?!?