Wednesday, January 14, 2009

We Are the Potted Plants of our Generation

I was talking to a single friend who's my age, and has also relocated far from her original home. We were talking about Rhode Island (not her home but she lived there for a while as my roomie in the aforementioned Buttonwoods) and she said something like: Doesn't it feel strange when you go home and it's changed or you've changed and you realize it's not home anymore. That it will never be home again in the way you took for granted as a child?

And I knew exactly what it was of which she spoke, and lo, I cried out in a loud voice: Yes! And then you think about the place you live now and how it's not really home either. And then you realize that you have no home, that you might never find one again!

Then we speculated on the theory that getting married and/or having children would possibly allow one to put down roots, and make a new place home, in a different sense from the home one knew as a child, perhaps, but rootiness, nonetheless. 

After musing for a moment on the reason that we seem unable to plant our roots into the ground I had an epif epipn a really bright idea and exclaimed: We are the potted plants of our generation!!! And she asked me if I would embroider that on a pillowcase for her. 

Lisa, if I could embroider, I totally would.


MW said...

Unfortunately the being married part doesn't help. (Ha! Now there's a sentence that says a lot! Hee hee.) I think I might have felt at home back in the Bay Area but now I've gone and ruined that... but I don't feel at home here either. Running from country to country? Sounds glamorous but it doesn't help either. It's hard to be homesick when you don't know where that would refer to. Perhaps I am peoplesick? That doesn't sound too nice.

I'm wondering if maybe you find home again when you "grow up," which would explain why neither of us seem to be able to do so. Shall we go for a sail? We are in the same boat after all...

Sus said...

Have you seen Garden State? You need to.

Stuce said...

Wow, I can totally relate to you right now, Jess, and I feel there are few who know what I mean when I verbalize these feelings. We recently moved to GA (as you know), and I came to the realization that New England really isn't home anymore. Not that Rhode Island ever was, but even New Hampshire. My entire family has left, my childhood home condemned and torn down, a lot of development in "downtown" Concord. (actually has something kind of close to a skyscraper there now).
But, as happy as I am with our situation, where is my home? I felt so bad for my kids thinking they might stay in the same state their entire life. Now, I'm thinking, is that so bad? It's roots, at least. Somewhere to call "home". Wow, what a ramble. Can you tell it's been on my mind?

l i s a said...

sure, we're all rootless, i guess. maybe it's just an illusion that we can have roots, or maybe that's a bygone era.

but just one thought. maybe married people can still be potted plants, but at least they share their pot with someone else. maybe it gets a little crowded in there, but the roots get tangled together, too.

but don't ask me, i don't know what i'm talking about.

Kathy said...

I left Rhode Island and the safety of my christian family at the ripe old age of 17, to come to an affluent town in the uppity suburbs of CT where yeah that never just felt quite right either. I have the irrepressable urge to MOVE constantly...(and I have a partner AND a pack of kids!)I've FINALLY at the ripe ol age of 35 met two girls at work I consider a friends...and am somewhat contented with life to sit still for awhile. (I have found myself once again interested in decorating, the last house I was interested in decorating we stayed in for 5 years) Ive found my greatest tool for reconnecting with people (including family) has been facebook......there are many ways for you to establish roots...cling onto *people* not places.

and write a damn book woulda?