Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy Jess

Why do people dress tiny babies in jeans? It looks silly and can't be comfortable. Sweatpants are comfy, pajamas are comfy. Jeans are comfy only in proportion to dressy clothes. If you love coming home from the board meeting and taking off that suit to put jeans on, great. But if you're dressing your 4 month old in business-wear, well I really can't help you. 

Lil'guy has two steady responses to any yes or no question. "Okay!" or "Nokay!" The next time someone suggests doing something I do not find appealing, like going to Chipotle for dinner (you know who you  Pinto) I'm going to shake my head vehemently and say, "Nokay, NOkay!!"

I have been considering the idea that my personal physician put forth at my last appointment, to wit, perhaps the middle of a midlife crisis and a new job is not the time to try cutting back on one's antidepressant medications. She may have been right. This week really really sucked. Prozac, I swear I'll never leave you again.

I find babies irresistibly cute even when they're barfing on me every five minutes and having humongous poop explosions out of their tiny widdle diapers. Should I seek counseling?

I think I've cleared up (ha!) that I'm okay with rain. It's been raining steadily here for weeks and I'm okay with it. It just makes the sunrises and sunsets more spectacular and makes me appreciate the sun more when I do see it. Portland, here I come.


litabug said...

Haha!! You're not crazy for loving those goopy little creatures. It means you're in the right job!

Also if you move to Portland I will be crazy jealous. Have you ever taken the quiz at It figures out where you should live based on what you like/dislike. Portland was in my top 5.

jess said...

Ooh, no. I'm going to right now! Thanks for the tip!

Wonder-Rachel said...

Hahaha - I agree with you on the jeans thing. Mine is two and I still think they look all stiff and uncomfortable.

I too am struggling with my own medication dilemmas this week. Good luck!

Jocelyn said...

Can't tell you how much I thought of you in Portland--such a healthy scene for young singles who are smart and discerning. Like you.

I think they must be a Prozac Capital, too, what with all the rain.

Babies being cute is the only thing that's kept humanity from dying out.

Angie Bailey said...

Oh Jess, I bought *one* pair of jeans for my son when he was an infant and we have a pic of him in it. He looks completely uncomfortable -- in fact, we couldn't even zip them up because of his baby chub. That was the first and last time he wore those jeans. Elastic is what babies want! Heck, it's what I want most days!

Jen said...

As a first-time mom, I stupidly bought many pairs of tiny jeans for my baby daughter. Two problems: 1) Jeans have to be paired with another item of clothing, which proved too difficult for my husband, and 2) If my daughter was wearing jeans, and I placed her in a sitting position, she toppled over backwards. (This also happens to me when I try to sit in jeans.)

When I had my twins I was a real smartie, and shunned all clothing that was not a single all-encompassing article. That is how I survived 2004-2005.

Then I accidentally got pregnant again and acquired through handmedowns many tiny pairs of jeans. Today, in fact, my failure-to-thrive toddler ran around looking like a gangsta all day, pausing only occasionally to call for help when her pants fell to her ankles.

Stick with the antidepressants. They are your happy candy.

Stuce said...

okay, I love you for several reasons. ONe, for admitting the prozac thing. Lots of people I know on it, few would admit it
Secondly: babies in jeans. It's true. I stick to the ones with the soft denim and elastic bands. It's hard to get me in those things these days. I too consider them dress wear. You know something fancy be going on when the jeans are whipped out!